Tuesday 1st June, 2010.

It's the first day of the month and the men in fluorescent jackets clutching clipboards have arrived in Gheluvelt Park to give the recently completed water feature-thingy the once-over. Ah yes, splendid. Plenty of wet dodgy surfaces for little kiddies to slip over and hurt themselves and for parents to take out legal action against the council? Check. Carry on men, good job well done. (It'll all end in tears, mark our words).

Bank Holiday Monday, May 31st, 2010.

1) It's a Bank Holiday and as any fool knows, especially those twazzocks who clogged up the Salisbury Ring Road yesterday morning on their way to the DIY outlets when they should be getting a life, that's the day for those really big Do It Yerself jobs(gawd). We've put this one off for months. Bought the blind for the bathroom ages ago but, y'know how it is, even in winter there's always something better to do. But it has been hanging over us like a cloud. Can't put it off any longer. So it's out with the step ladders before wiping the dust and cobwebs off the tool box (such as it is). Of course, the step ladders a rickety and they don't fit into the confined space around the sink. David has just the two weapons in his arsenal: sweat and bad language. Each are used copiously to take down the old fixings and fit the new. And I've got a dodgy left elbow, he tells Vicky more than once. 30 minutes later, and having initially fitted it back to front, the blind is safe and sound in it's housing.

2) Now for the skilled bit of the operation. David must give way and Vicky takes over for the adjusting of the 'very fiddly' chords.

3) Another 15 minutes later and, although there are one or two unidentified bits left over, ithe blind is ready for testing. a) blind down and open.

4) b) Blind down and closed.

5) c) Blind raised and bottom window open. Good eh? Nearly 60 minutes have flown by, no blood was spilt, and it's time to put the ladders and tool box away again (for another couple of years, hopefully) before having a well-deserved cuppa and a rest. DIY 'r' us.

Salisbury Cathedral, Sunday 30th May, 2010.

1) After the hill climb we took a swift detour into Salisbury to have a look at the Cathedral. We took loads of photos of the exterior but you'll have to take our word for it 'cos we haven't used any here as the building was covered in scaffolding and sheeting. Lovely setting tho'. Spacious surrounds and some lovely buildings around its park. So that's another place to re-visit at some point.

2) Howard enjoying the quietude of the Cloister Garden after all those racing cars and 'bikes at the hill climb.

3) David caught doing the same. He's girding his loins for the long challenging drive back home. Vicky drove the dual-carriageway bits. David is soooo hard done by. It's a shame for him (oh yes).

British Hillclimb Championship, Gurston Down, Sunday May 30th, 2010.

A lot of photos to get through this time. Only took 444, so think yerselves lucky.
1) Food Police Alert! Food Police Alert!! Only been here five minutes and already some folk (ahem, Paula and Tony) are at the deep fried scampi and chippy-chips. We are outrageously appalled, obviously. It's all we can do to resist 'phoning the Food Police Hot Line.

2) See Vic? I'm not the only one who takes loads of shots of the fastest car on the hills every time I see it. Tony's taking one as well. And there's Scott Moran, in the background, chatting to a journo-fella so it's a really interesting photo (oh yes).

3) We have been to five hillclimb venues over the years and each one is different. Gurston runs through farmland and where there's a farm there's bound to be an olde barns to explore, and where there's a barn there's bound to be some hidden treasure. Here Tony has discovered an old rusting Rover V8 engine. Hmmm, thinks David, now all we need is an olde rusting hillclimb car to put it in. Do a quick resto-job and away we go!

4) Vicky is being tested to the limit. Two blatant violations of the Food Police Code of Conduct in one day. Do I ring 'em, or don't I?

5) Tony ponders another diabolically complicated example of motorcycle engines powering four wheels. We've grown used to single-engine variants. There's even a Suzuki Hayabusa V8 that regularly makes the Top 12 Run Off. But this takes some beating.....................

6).................this one's got two Hayabusa's running on a single crank (presumably). A straight eight across the 'frame'. It sounded good too. Like a deep-throated two-stroke. Probably due to how high it can rev or something.

7) Some 'bikes just naturally draw you in. This was the first one we spotted when we arrived. Poor Vicky has to listen to David telling her that it was the 'bike that any self-respecting rider aspired to back in the day. Especially those who could only afford a Honda SL125. It wasn't being ridden particularly quickly but then, having thought about it for a minute or so, it was being ridden a damn sight quicker than David would have managed. All things are relative, eh?

8) Vicky tells the rest of our little group to carry on without her: she could be some time.

9) A stoppie in a car? Well, it has got a 'bike engine. This is Adam Steel in his Martlet AS1 missing the sane braking point and indulging in some ridiculously late braking at The Karousel. Of course he missed the apex yet, amazingly, he was still the fastest in the class! That's determination.

10) Zooming. Leaping. Steering. Landing. All in the same instant. All the time staying focused on the next bend which, as it happens, it about 50 yards ahead. This is Martin Robbins on his 590cc KTM cresting Deers Leap.

11) This is Paul Jarret doing roughly the same thing, but in a slightly less animated way, at the same place on his Aprilia SXV500. So, which one was the quickest? Answer: Jarret. Robbins was third, about four tenths slower. Makes you wonder where he lost out, eh?

12) On the way back down we spotted this group of fellas swarming out of their nest in a handy tree. Not many folk hung around to count 'em all but, being brave, we did. 2, 376 if you were wonderin'. So, all-in-all another great day out at a hillclimb. Here's to the next one.

Gheluvelt Park swans update: Tuesday 25th May, 2010.

Walking though the park today I noticed that the nest had been abandoned and there was no sign of either the adults or any signets. Walking around the pond I eventually spotted them. Fair warms the old cockles, as they say. Let's hope they both survive.

East Devon (Pt II), Sunday 22nd May, 2010.

1) Wha-hey! It's late afternoon and we're two British day trippers by the seaside in sunny east Devon. Branscombe Beach to be precise. We've got our grasstrack/hillclimb chairs to sit on and we've paid for two hours car parking. Blimey. What on earth are we going to do for all that time? It's amazing how therapeutic this is. Pick up a pebble, twirl it between yer fingers. Flick it back onto the beach while chatting and watching folk. Repeat. The two hours fly by. Off to Beer next.


2) Despite the hordes we've parked up in Beer and have hit the beach to get some early evening shots of the most photographed fishing boats in the whole wide world. Well, East Devon, anyway. Oh alright, in Beer. Everyone photographs them, anyway, and we're no exception.



3) Here's just one person who photographed them today. Another one is behind the camera.

4) The beach at Beer is shared between the fishermen and their boats and the visiting holiday makers. Each tolerate the other. It's essential that you look where you are going at all times. Nets, lobster pots, hawsers, ropes, fishermen, all over the place. You wouldn't want to be tripping up, would you? Very embarrassing (and, no, we didn't, but you might).

Time to get something to eat before we get driving back home. Oooh look, says David, there's a fish and chip shop open on the High Street. Handy that.

The Donkey Sanctuary, Nr Sidmouth, Devon, Saturday 22nd May, 2010.

1) We estimate that it has been about 20 years since we last visited the Donkey Sanctuary. It's changed a lot. Bigger, better layout. Far more donkeys to make friends with and much longer walks around the paddocks where they graze. It looks like we might be here far longer than the couple of hours we envisaged.

2) It's just gone midday and the sun is shining but, thankfully, it's not too hot yet. The lovely weather means all the donkeys are outside (unless they're unwell). Obviously, they are happy to be outside. Some would appear to be, ahem, happier than others.

3) Having done the first mile walk it's time to hit the Sanctuary's cafe for a well-earned drink and a panini. Make mine a ham, onion and mustard, says David in that way of his, and go heavy on the spicy wedges. Vicky seems happy to indulge him on this occasion. Hmm, thinks David, must come here more often.

4) This isn't a donkey. This is Gypsy, a pony, who shares a paddock, and is best-est friends, with the the donkeys Laurel and Hardy (stars of daytime TV), and Tim who are enjoying the early afternoon sunshine. Gypsy is a bit hot though and would like to stay here in the shade if it's all the same to you.

5) Pardon? No, sorry, you'll have to speak up, I didn't quite catch that. Don't know who these ears belong to but you couldn't possibly resist them, could you?

6) Someone has got their eyes on Howard. An inquest has started. He's not after our buttercups, is he?

7) Mmmm, buttercups. So juicy at this time of year.

It's nearly 4:00pm and time to leave now. We have been here for about four hours. It has been great. We shall return soon. Shan't wait another twenty years, anyway, that's for sure.