Villa Park, Saturday 26th February, 2011.

1) It's a big day. This is Howard's first ever visit to Villa Park. Best to get there early then.

2) Pre-match tradition No. 1: something from the deep-fat fryer to ward off the biting chill wind.

3) Pre-match tradition No. 2: the balti pie option (note unsuccessful attempt at hiding portion of chips behind left elbow).

4) Howard is impressed with the view from the bargain offer £15 seats but agrees with Vicky: we've got here too early!

5) It's half-time and we think it's pretty clear which team the Holte Enders want to win tomorrow's Carling Cup Final: and it's definitely not Small Heath FC.

6) Villa take the lead through an Ashley 'He'll amount to nowt' Young penalty. But look! The Blackburn Rovers goalie is moving off his line before the kick has even been taken! If only Sky hadn't sacked that very nice Andy Gray-fella for (allegedly) being a sexist scrote. He could have shown this a zillion times from a variety of jaunty angles and ordered a replay. The Blackburn fans (all two hundred of them) must be absolutely incandescent with rage.

7) Villa players and Holte Enders celebrate taking the lead. Villa went on to win 4-1. Meanwhile, 10 miles up the road, The Wolves are thrashing Blackpool 4-0. So that's West Mids 8, North West 1. A good day all 'round then.

8) Ah yes, That reminds me. There's an epic game between the two finest teams in World Football coming up in a few days time. That's right: Wolves v Wolves Reserves at the Compton Training Ground! Ah, the olde jokes are the best.

Gheluvelt Park, Thursday 25th February, 2011.

1) One February day (yesterday) with above-average temperatures is all it takes for an industrious bee to come out of hibernation and take advantage of the crocuses (crocusi?). Whatcha mean, ya can't see it? Are you blind? It's head is emerging from the flower fergawd's sake. Whatcha think this is, www.macrolensesareus.com?

2) OK, you can stop squinting. There are no bees in this photo........................

3)............................nor this one. Unless there is one that we don't know about, of course. It's like visual torture, isn't it?

Eversham Cats Protection, Sunday 20th February, 2011.

1) Elsie is still going strong, albeit in a demanding-reassurance-sort-of-way. Luckily, there's a long queue of folk lining up to do the job.
2) If we had more room, we'd take him home with us Pt 2819.

3) I'm not coming out and I'm certainly not going to eat that. One has one's standards.

4) He who takes the high ground rules.

5) These two come as a pair, Dave. Yes, but what about the other two in the back there?

6) Pandora has eaten and is having a nice kip. The last thing she wants is two caring people waking her up to administer her daily face wash.........................

7)................................oops. No amount of telling her that it is for her own good can cheer her up.

Gheluvelt Park, Saturday 12th February, 2011.

Spring is here and it's only mid-February. We know this 'cos the snowdrops are out. There'll be crocuses next, you'll see.

Note to self: must try to take a sharper photo next time.

Chinese New Year, Birmingham, Sunday 6th February 2011.

1) Unlike last year we arrive in good time for the opening Dragon Dance which signifies the 'awakening' of the Chinese New Year (the Year of The Rabbit). We note with raised eyebrows that the young Dragon dancers are all English rather than from the Chinese community. We later see the same dancers ambling past all the Chinese food stalls whilst chomping on their lunchtime MacDonald's fix. Hmmmm.

2) Vicky is in heaven. She has found the Villa-in-the-community-stall and has just bought two cut-price tickets (£15 each) for the game verses The Dirty Cheatin' Blackburn Rovers. David, having just smugly told her that The Mighty Wolves don't do cut-price tickets 'cos their games are always sold out, thankfully, behind the camera.

3) Mmmmm! Noodles!! Give me Chicken noodles!!! Vicky waits her turn whilst David salivates over the egg fried rice and chicken option. We both share three spring rolls - as you do.

4) Howard takes a fancy to the fancies but we fancy the signature savoury buns. How very 'Singapore'. Happy memories.

5) With tummies full we walk over to the Cube to see how things are coming along. Surely, it must be filling up with office/apartment tenants by now?

6) Um, nope. We blame the Coalition. But there are some inhabitants who are all heart. Vicky and Howard offer them some encouragement: 'There-there. People will move in one day'.

7) You see? That's the thing with new-fangled architecture. Buildings without a roof? It's lunacy! Folk can't even fly a balloon without getting sucked heavenwards by the wicked updraft.

8) Not fund-raising for the British Heart Foundation. But we could be.

9) Around the back of the Repertory Theatre, which is now closed and will eventually be re-furbished to become part of Birmingham's new central library, and some folk have already 'got at it'.